JESS WRIGHT knows better than most just how devastating post-natal depression can be.
After the birth of her son Presley in March, the former Towie regular endured a month of spiralling anxiety and scary lows that made her wonder if she could carry on.
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It had come completely out of the blue for Jess, 37, who had previously assumed PND only affected women with a history of mental health issues.
She says: “It’s something quite a lot of women get, but it is still such a taboo subject.
“If I’d heard someone had postnatal depression 15 years ago, I probably would not have judged, but I’d have suspected there was a reason for it and that the person was prone to anxiety and depression anyway.
“But it’s absolutely not the case. It’s a real stab in the dark and can happen to anyone.”
Calling her experience “extremely hard”, Jess says her symptoms lasted for four weeks after the birth, before subsiding.
She says: “I know for some women it can go on for six months to a year, which is awful.
“Not only is it overwhelming when you leave the hospital with the baby, but no one gives you a rule book. You have to go with your gut and do the best you can.
“Then, if you have something mentally torturing you as well, such as postnatal depression, each day you’re asking yourself,
“‘Am I going to feel better soon?’ ”
‘I knew I had to be strong for the baby’
Jess’s struggles were worsened by the fact that Presley had reflux and a dairy allergy, which made her feel helpless as a mum.
She says: “There was a lot going on at the beginning. He was very unwell but I’ve come out the other side, so I’m really grateful.
“I didn’t want to end it all, but you do have thoughts like, ‘If I have to feel like this for ever, I would rather just not.’
“But I knew I had to be strong for the baby, and I had hope and faith that it was going to pass.”
Presley turns one in May, and Jess is starting to think about baby number two — though her husband, businessman William Lee-Kemp, who she married in 2021, is not quite so keen.
She says: “Now I’ve had one, I feel like I would breeze a second, I’m so much more confident.
“My husband says one is enough but I think a bigger family would be nice. It wouldn’t be a football team, but probably one more.
“I’ve always wanted a girl. I think it’s important for a woman to have a girl and to have a daughter because that bond is unbreakable and you are best friends in the end.”
“My son is quite a mummy’s boy.
“He’s starting to cuddle back and laughing all the time. He is obsessed with Minnie Mouse — my husband is like, ‘Give him Mickey’, and I’m like, ‘No, if he wants Minnie, I’ll give him Minnie!’
“If my son wants to wear pink, then absolutely he can go for it. I don’t like gender stereotypes.
“If he wants to do my hair and make-up, that’s fine too.”
“I want my child to be level-headed and to be disciplined in the right way.
“I don’t believe that shouting at him to stop doing something is the right way.
“I want to be really logical with him and to make sure he is aware of how you should behave, as opposed to me telling him.
“There are all these things online which say shouting at your child only makes them worse, and there are ways to be really calm.
“But it is tough with him because he is very demanding.
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“When he wants something, the whole world knows about it.
“He is very strong-willed. You just don’t know what you are going to get — they are born with their little personalities.
“One thing motherhood’s taught me hugely is patience, and to always go with your gut. Don’t second-guess it or be too hard on yourself. Give yourself a break.”
Jess, who was in Towie from 2010 to 2016, comes from a famously close-knit family, which includes her TV presenter brother Mark and his wife, actress Michelle Keegan.
They are yet to babysit Presley, but Jess says they are in constant touch.
“Michelle and Mark are an amazing aunt and uncle,” she says.
“In our family we all just love kids so the fact we have got our own now is amazing.”
Jess’s life has changed in other ways too.
She says: “I feel sexy now. It’s taken four to five months to feel I’ve got my body back, but I’m loving it.
“There was a point when I had the baby and I never thought I would get it back. I looked in the mirror and thought, ‘This is never going to be the same again’.
“But you do get there with persistence and trying to eat healthily, within reason.
“I’ve been back to the gym but I’ve taken it really slowly, especially because I had a C-section.
“You might not feel ready for ten or 12 weeks or until six months. We are only human.”
